Swine don't you just call it what it is....

The current swine flu pandemic has caused some common things that annoy me to resurface. Well, actually just one main thing. Throwing up and other stomach related symptoms are not symptoms of the flu. I realize we call it the "stomach flu," but that is just a euphemism for diarrhea and throwing up; it has nothing to do with the influenza virus. I'd like to say that I'm just privy to this information because I come from a family of doctors and so I'm in on some sort of secret that the rest of the population just doesn't know. That's not the case though. I honestly don't think this piece of knowledge has anything to do with my family's background in the medical field. My knowledge about Hepatitis C, acid reflux and colonoscopies can all be attributed to the family business, influenza cannot be. Rather, I am simply just an average laymen who reads the newspaper. Without fail, every single year before flu season gets underway there is an article in every single news source about the symptoms of the flu. The symptoms are much like those of the common cold, accompanied by a high fever and body aches. You'll also learn that antibiotics will prove useless against the flu virus because, well, antibiotics only help against bacterial infections not viral ones.

So folks, pick up a newspaper, turn on CNN, go to wikipedia, read WebMD like the hypochondriac you are...I don't care how you do it, but once and for all learn the facts about what the symptoms of the flu are. Oh, and be sure to wash your hands with soap and warm water...we don't need to be catching swine flu.

Take my breath away

I've known since I was 18 and first came up to Milwaukee that it was going to be worse for my allergies than Chicago was. Every year in September I would get a sinus infection. Sophomore year my room flooded and I soon after developed a severe headache problem. After several trips to Student Health, a neurologist and an MRI, I was diagnosed with "atypical migraines". Translation, we're not sure what the hell is wrong with you. It was suggested that the flood could have caused a mold problem. I told the school and they said they had checked and found nothing. I don't believe they really checked, but whatever. Flash forward three years. After graduating I moved out to Tosa and started getting strep throat and tonsillitis like most people catch the common cold. Once again a mold situation seemed to be the problem.

Milwaukee is constantly under a air quality warning. All summer long I am one of those people who the recommend stay in doors. Today, I'm in the midst of a wicked asthma attack. Luckily I had my inhaler with me. I took too puffs and went back to working. About half an hour later nothing had changed. I went out in search of a trigger. No one around me has flowers. I'm just sitting at my desk, and it's not like typing is particularly strenuous. I took two more puffs. Back to work. Twenty minutes later, there is still no improvement. I decide I'll go step outside for a little breather in hopes the fresh air will help somehow. Boy was the air fresh, it reaked of cow manure and I didn't last very long. I bent over in hopes of that helping, but mostly I just got dizzy. Two more puffs and then I returned inside. I sat in my chair with my head between my knees looking like a crazy person. Here were are probably about an hour later and my chest is still tight, I'm coughing every few minutes, which then makes me gasp for air and I'm all shakey from taking my inhaler so much. Partay.

My asthma as gotten increasingly worse over the last four or so years. When I was first diagnosed it was strictly exercise induced. Now it is more random and I often can't place the trigger, other than poor air quality and polution.

It's actually bad for my health to be living here. Check out the No. 2 city on this list.